Parentwise

A few days ago Les and I were in a Walmart doing a little impulse shopping when a man walked in holding a 4 or so year-old boy who was having a screaming fit. At first we weren't sure if the man was the little boy's father because of the way he was choosing to react to this tantrum (we should have know better). As they walked in the man said to the little boy in a very panicked, frantic, and obviously frustrated tone,"what do you want? a cookie, there are donuts right here, do you want a donut, I'll give you a donut. I have one right here. Oh, ice cream? Okay, what ice cream would you like? Pick whichever one you want. Whatever you want. " This is basically just a replay from my mind of what actually happened, but it's pretty close to the real thing. Les and I stood there staring (and Les usually doesn't stare). Watching this encounter scared us both immensely and neither one could turn away. We didn't speak it to each other but I know we were both picturing us doing that exact same thing in 3 years from now - and the thought of that freaked us out.

We do currently have a little problem with the 'giving Gus anything he wants to keep him quiet' thing. It is one of the main things we need to work on as far as our parenting skills go. A one year old (and younger even) can absolutely throw a pre-meditated tantrum. They are so much smarter than we give them credit for. Les and I, from the the very beginning, have joked that Gus has us on "parentwise" (a play on the "Dr. Spock" of our time - "Babywise"). He has us at his every grunt and call and he knows exactly how to get what he wants.

At the very moment, after watching this parenting train wreck in the Walmart, Les and I made a vow to one another that we would not be that parent. We would not let this manipulation run it's course to such extremes. We even shook hands to seal the deal.

So, um, now any suggestions on how to parent?